Malaysian Idol video....

Malaysian idol!!!!!!!!!!!!

Who would have guess...

that I would be on TV....

I was just shocked to me knees when I saw on friday night the audition clips from KL....

Man, I look weird...sound weird.....and it certainly is weird to see yourself on TV...

And it was really fun to have people calling you up when they see you on TV...

Well, even so... the endless bugging from people around me especially classmates and school friends who just couldn't get enough asking me all the juicy details are getting on my last nerve but its an art to turn them down by letting them know about my withdrawal from the competition...

Yes...I know it's dumb but my parents insist me to study hard and perhaps if I may...I'll join again next year....I have to obey ma...

And I did Acheive my purpose thats to prove to myself that I really can sing....

I am also able to have more exposure and experience till next year to prepare myself for the eliminations so its a win win situation...

So vote for me..next year la....

Oh Ya before I forget...

If u missed me on the telly...

see me on the website

www.kreees.com/idol

Shut up!

Ever heard a depressing voice in your head?

Ever been thinking that people around you might hate you?

Think that you are the loneliest soul around?

Yup...Thats been playing around my mind for weeks

Been so damned tired about my life lately...

I feel that my friends hate me so very much..

I feel like I caused a lot of trouble and lead people around me to stumble.......

Feel like I aint no so called " Good Christian" or up to the standard...

Feel so lost....so depressed...

A song plays in my mind..."Nobody loves me, everybody hates me"

I even hate myself....

Then today, came my God-send Angel,

SI PENG, yup HO SI PENG....

He talked me out of stupidity....

You see there are a lot of wisdom behind it.....

Just a few nights ago, My friend Kenny Stayed up till 4 just to talk me out of such depression but I ignored him

It's until Si Peng came and just ask me to ask such voices to SHUT UP!!!

Well, i needed that.....

You see.....

I need to bust some myths in my life...

First thing first. my friends don't hate me, not all at least....

Angel, Kenny, Eu Jin, and a whole bunch dont at least.....

Then, I think I am Not that big of a deal that I can Change someone or make some one else stumble...I ain't that Great....

Then, I forgotten I am not created perfect....

Well, sometimes it's the evil one or even ourselves who creates such lies....

The truth is there are still people there for me and I am loved not by all, but by many....

Well one week passed....

Hmmmm.....

One whole week of holiday where its

TV and onlining and not much of study and tuition.....

Well, this week need to change a bit.....

Need to study....

Finish up my novel......

And still enjoy myself....

SO how has your week been.....

We have 168 hours in a week...

How many have we used to bless others?

How many is used to study?

How many has been used to watch TV?

Asking such questions....

1.Let our guilt take over now

2.Turn off the PC

3.Go to your study table....

4.Open up your books

5.Start studying!!!!

OR

1.You could say..."Hey, I could do it tommorow"

2.And I could assure you school reopens and you will have nothing accomplish...

ALL THE BEST!!!aaaaaaa

To disappoint or be disappointed, that is the QUESTION!

Well our lives revolve around disappointment.... Is either we disappoint others or we get hurt, disappointed.... I am just so tired about my life.....It's like I just found out I have disappointed so many people....Too many yet there are also many people whom I just found out are big disappointers in my life. I try very hard not to disappoint others...and to tell the truth, I really tried....Everyone has so much expectations on me and i just wanna get away from all my pressure, and just move on.....I am expected to do so much and when I fail to reach that mark they've set, They get diappointed and I will get depressed...Perhaps that is how I am emotionally....I always try to please everyone and be as fake as possible to myself to a point where I start to deceive myself.....I really need a break.... I treat everyone with my heart....I have always told them truths from my heart and behind be I am stabbed hurtfully....I really felt disappointed by the people I am closest with.....People can be so fake at times.... So, well, I am lost, puzzled, confused and pressured as well as depressed....... What do I do?